


Maybe Not Today

by Dancingqueen17



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Child Abuse, Drug Use, Self Harm, Suicidal Klaus, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Supportive Ben, Underage Drinking, Vanya Can Use Her Powers, drug overdose, supportive diego
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-09-26
Packaged: 2020-06-25 01:52:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19735957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dancingqueen17/pseuds/Dancingqueen17
Summary: He couldn’t do it. The loving words Ben had said to him floated around his head. He hated it. Klaus sighed and set his blade gently on the table. Maybe not today, but soon.





	1. Chapter 1

Klaus didn’t know how much more he could take. The voices screamed at him all the time now, and not just the ones in his head. His siblings seemed to be highly irritated with him and was constantly getting on his fathers nerves. Which won him a one way trip to the mausoleum. His mere existence was burdening people’s lives, most of all his own.

The loud ringing of the dinner bell pulled him from his thoughts. His moping would have to wait till later. He hadn’t eaten in what felt like ages. Not because he wasn’t hungry, but because he didn’t deserve to. He didn’t deserve anything. His mind had become fuzzy from the lack of food. Klaus was halfway down the steps before he realized he didn’t have on a shirt. He seemed to be forgetting a lot these days.

“Number Four, I expect you to be on time when I ring the dinner bell. We’ve been waiting for five minutes.” Reginald said as Klaus, who was now fully clothed, came through the entryway.

Only Father could make five minutes sound like years. Klaus didn’t mean to take that long. But with his fuzzy mind simple tasks, like buttoning a shirt, became increasingly difficult.

“Sorry, won’t happen again.” Klaus grumbled quietly, while taking a seat.

All of his siblings gasped, while Reginald fumed. Father always sat first. He was head of the house, but Klaus was too out of it to remember that.

“Number Four!” Reginald yelled while pulling Klaus up from his collar. Klaus gasped when Reginald wrapped his hand around his throat and lifted his feet from the ground. “I will not stand here and let you disrespect me!” Klaus’s vision was getting blurry as Reginalds grip tightened. “Go to your room! Dinner is for those who follow rules!” Reginald finished, while dropping Klaus .

Klaus raised his hand in a mock salute a muttered a quick, “Yes Sir” before making his way back to his room. Klaus heard whispering behind him. Bits and pieces of conversations.

“He deserved it.”

“What an idiot.”

“Attention seeker.”

“He’s probably high.”

Klaus’s foot got caught and he tripped up the stairs. He caught himself before he fell. Of course his siblings thought he was a attention seeking druggie. A wave of hatred washed over him. After all that’s what he was.

After ten excruciating minutes Klaus made it to his room. The stairs turned out to be more of an obstacle than he thought. He felt weak. Klaus wasn’t a big fan of feelings, they complicated things. He needed his box. With the little energy Klaus had left he reached under his bed to grab a small wooden box. Father told him it was the only thing that his true mother had given him. Klaus didn’t even know who she was, and he hated her. She had given up her son for money. But after all, who would want him? Inside the box was a small bag of pills, two blades he had taken from Ben’s pencil sharpeners, and a small flask filled with Fathers vodka. Klaus opened the flask and downed it in one sip. Klaus had consumed his fair share of alcohol in the past. Perhaps too much for a boy his age, but he didn’t care. Besides the more he drank, the more those pesky ghosts left him alone.

___________________

Klaus didn’t remember going to sleep, but he woke up to knocking on his door. 

“Klaus, hurry up. We don’t want a repeat of yesterday.” Ben yelled through the door, effectively waking Klaus.

Klaus grumbled and rolled out of bed. He felt like shit and his head hurt. Hangovers were a bitch. Klaus rubbed his eyes a few times before going to find his clothes. He didnt make it more than two steps before his vision got blurry and his legs gave out under him. Klaus tried to keep his eyes open, but soon succumbed to the darkness. The last thing he heard was Ben yelling at him to hurry up.

___________________

Klaus woke up a few hours later in the exact same spot he had passed out. Nobody had checked on him. But he wasn't surprised. Who would want to check on him anyways.

Klaus slowly pulled himself off the ground. He didn't care that he had probably passed out due to the fact that the only thing he'd had in days was vodka. But he did care that it was 3 in the afternoon, which meant be had missed lunch and breakfast. He was in for a beating. Klaus decided he'd better just go downstairs and get it over with. It was better than being caught off guard.

"Well I see you finally decided to get out of bed." Reginald growled when he saw Klaus in the living room.

"I'm sorry sir." Klaus uttered quietly. He knew better than to talk back now.

Reginald crossed the room to stand in from of Klaus. "I am raising strong children. With the exception of you. You are ruining the Hargreeves name. This is unacceptable behavior!" Reginald said, finishing his statement with a harsh slap.

Klaus was prepared though. The slap didn't hurt half as much as it should have. The hangover took off the edge.

"You are pathetic. I thought you were better than petty acts of vigilance. I guess I thought wrong. I hope this will teach you the manners you clearly lack." 

One slap turned into two. Then three. Some punches here and there. But Klaus didn't really care. He didn't think he could at this point. His head was throbbing from the multiple blows it had taken. He felt like he was gonna pass out any moment. 

"Go to your room. And if you're late for dinner I'll make sure you pay."

Klaus stumbled back up the steps. He stopped at the bathroom and assessed his damage. A black eye, a probably broken nose, and a fat lip.  
He looked horrible. But then again, didn't he always?


	2. Chapter 2

Klaus didn't know what day it was. He never did these days. He never knew anything these days. He felt so crowded. Even alone in his room, something was always near him. Klaus could feel it. He wished he couldn't. But he knew a very simple way to stop feeling things. 

Klaus grabbed his box and headed to the bathroom. He would have stayed in his room, but it was easier to clean blood off the tiles than the carpet. Klaus avoided the bathroom mirror and slid down on the floor. He already knew he looked like shit. He opened his box and pulled out his blades. He knew what he was doing was dangerous. But he didn't give a fuck.

The metal felt nice against his skin. It always did. Klaus pressed down on the blade and dragged it across his arm. He liked how the blood looked against his skin. Then he did it again. Deeper this time. Probably too deep. But he didn't care.

"Sorry I didn't realize someone was-" Diego started, before looking at Klaus, covered in his own blood on the floor.

"Holy shit, are you..., I mean like did you do this. Fuck you need help. I'll go get Grace." Diego rambled.

"No. I'm perfectly fine. Just pretend you never saw me." Klaus said while pressing a towel to his cuts.

"No. You need help. I'm going to get help." Diego said running off.

Klaus meant to tell him no. He meant to yell at Diego and assure him he was fine. But the blood loss was getting to him and his brain wasn’t working properly. He needed to get out of here. His room was only down the hall. He could make it.

Klaus pushed himself off the floor with his non-bleeding arm and tried to stand. He felt dizzy and things were swirling around him. But he was fine, he could do this.

His first step was shaky, but it was nothing compared to the rest. He wasn’t even walking anymore, he was just wobbling from side to side, grabbing random objects so he didn’t fall. It was pathetic. He was pathetic. Klaus was so out of it he almost ran into Diego, who was running at full speed.

“Come on Mom, here he is.” Diego said quickly, while pulling Grace along with him.

“Oh no, you look sickly. And that wound will need stitches. You must come with me. Reginald will also need to be notified. Diego go get Mr. Hargreeves. I’ll bring you his quarters. I can aid you there let’s go Klaus.” Grace said, a hint of worry seeping into her perfect voice.

Klaus wanted to protest, but his tongue felt heavy. He couldn’t keep his eyes open either. Before he knew it he was splayed out on the floor, unconscious.


	3. Chapter 3

Klaus didn't expect to wake up. He'd hoped for it. But all too soon he opened his eyes to find out he was still alive. So close.

"Ah, I see you're awake Number 4. We will need to have a talk about you're, ah, shall we say habits. But for now you will go to sleep until I see you are fit to be walking." Reginald said curtly.  
Not like a father would to a son. Did Klaus even qualify as his son? He wasn't good enough. Tears burned behind his eyes.

"I said sleep!" Reginald yelled. "I'll be back shortly." And with that he walked away.

Klaus closed his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. The the ghosts wouldn't let him. They rarely did. As much as he hated the thought of Diego watching him die, he really wished that's what would have happened.

He wondered if his siblings even wanted to deal with him anymore. He didn't really contribute anything to the family and he wasn't much of a help on missions. Everyone would be better off if he had just died.

The door slammed open and Reginald walked in with Grace right behind him. Grace carried a large tray of food. Just seeing all that food made his stomach flip. He didn't deserve it.


End file.
